


Chessboards and Rainbows

by Music_Chick



Category: Digimon - All Media Types
Genre: Bittersweet Ending, Character Death, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, POV First Person, Post-Digimon Adventure: Last Evolution Kizuna (Movie), Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-13
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-21 10:07:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30020133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Music_Chick/pseuds/Music_Chick
Summary: I don't profess to understand the complete science of pheromones. However, with Mimi Tachikawa in my life, I soon learned that some things were worth not needing to fully comprehend. Some things were better off clearing the mind and living in the moment; for life is precious and what little time we had left together is what really mattered.
Relationships: Izumi Koushirou | Izzy Izumi/Tachikawa Mimi
Comments: 9
Kudos: 7





	Chessboards and Rainbows

At eighty-eight years old, I, Izzy Izumi, stand here before you all today to say that I still don't profess to understand the complete science of pheromones.

From what I do know, pheromones are chemical signals. They carry information between individuals within a species and induce a physiological or behavioral response in the receiving individual. This is what plays a crucial role in mate finding and other interactions among animals.

Humans confuse pheromones with love and the emotional aspect they place on it is overwhelmingly baffling.

There's the world's view of love: Material objects given. Sex. Speech. Actions. Spending time together.

There's the science of love: Pheromones. The rest that occurs is due to our instinct to reproduce.

Mimi Tachikawa was an enigma, one science couldn't measure.

One minute she cried that a bug landed on her hair when she was ten. The next, she created a bug farm in a shoebox, gave them all names, could recite the names of every body part of each bug in the bug farm, and told them which roles they had to play so that everyone could get along.

Bugs can't understand human language, nor have the capacity to follow human societal ethics. How could a bright ten year old like herself not understand this, yet explore the library on her own free will to gain knowledge on insects so that her fear was eradicated?

An enigma, I say.

At twenty-one years old, she had an online store declaring that she found her calling. A few years later, after using me for taste testing, Mimi declared being a chef was her true calling in life and optimistically believed that all would bow to her eventual cook show and recipe book - How that woman managed to learn which seasonings went well with each other is still a missing puzzle piece to me when I have known her all my life and up until that moment cooking was not a talent that she possessed.

An even more odd missing puzzle piece was how I managed to fall in love with her.

I was convinced Mimi was out of her mind when she said yes after I asked her out. Even more when she said yes after I asked her to marry me. More so that I fell victim to her pheromones.

I'm not one to share private information, but I owe this to her. Her story - that is, our story - deserves to be shared.

Mimi Tachikawa was a shiny, neon rainbow, full of energy, and faced life with emotions. Consequences were thought of after actions occurred - with not always the desired outcome reached.

I was a pristine, dignified, black and white chessboard; a level-headed man, and faced life logically. Life was a chess game and when examined long enough with patience, the answers would eventually fall in their proper places.

Emotions do not have a place in science because they cannot be measured. It's illogical. Yet, somehow I became a typical, head over heels sixteen year old boy trying to find ways to impress Mimi with her unique love language. I began to care how I dressed. Combed my hair. Wore cologne. Scourged the internet on how to speak to girls - all the human equivalents to a mating dance.

Before we dated there was a day that she came to visit at my office. I believe we were seventeen. Despite informing her that I had a cleaning service, Mimi still found it necessary to tidy up. Why expand that energy, at that time I couldn't fathom.

After the office was spotless, Mimi had decided that she would teach me what is called the Five Love Languages. Have any of you heard of that? No? If you think about it, it makes sense. It falls in line with the world's view of love that I mentioned earlier:

Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch.

She claimed we all did these, but everyone naturally found one or two to mean more than the others, which would be that person's unique love language. I was then asked which I thought was hers.

Naturally, as I was still pining over her, I wanted to know which one was hers. I had planned to make a note, then use it to my advantage so that Mimi Tachikawa would finally look up and notice me.

"Receiving gifts?" I asked.

She chuckled. "Nope, but I'll never say no to gifts. It's a shame that a lot of people think that about me."

"Mimi, receiving gifts as a love language should not be frowned upon. You like material things. That's who you are."

"I never said it was to be frowned upon," she replied curtly. "I'm more than a girl that happens to like diamonds and cutesy outfits. Don't be so quick to judge."

"But I'm not judging. I was asked to guess. Therefore, it was an educational guess."

She sighed. I guess she was disappointed that I was incorrect.

"Izzy, what speaks to my heart are Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch. My favorite kind of movies are romance because of that. The cheesier the lines, the better. But don't get confused. Not just any guy can fool me. I have a knack for seeing through people's hearts about their sincerity."

Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch. That would be a problem for me. Knowing Mimi, she would want these two languages in the extreme. My heart said yes, my brain was not ready; it needed time to process this.

"I already know which are yours," she declared with a brilliant smile as she pushed a chair next to my work desk and sat on it crossed-legged.

"How could you possibly know? Did you not say there was a test I needed to take?"

"Oh, that," she laughed as she waved a hand in a carefree manner to dismiss the statement. "Honey, since I already took it for me, all of those questions are up here," she tapped her right temple. "I bet it'll surprise you."

I let out a nervous chuckle. "No thanks. I'd prefer to take this test to get an accurate reading."

Mimi pouted. "You're going to listen to me because the test is in my head. Izzy, we're in the same class. Do you really believe I'm an airhead as other people claim?"

"Who is saying that you're an airhead?" I leaned forward upset. "You're the farthest from an airhead. You care about our friends and you do just fine in school. Mimi, tell me who they are."

All Mimi did was smile. "Izzy, don't ever change who you are."

"Mimi, who are -"

"Your love languages are Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation," she declared with a triumphant, beaming smile.

I thought about it. It sounded halfway accurate. Words of Affirmation? How? Then she threw a wrench interrupting my protest.

"But I bet you have a tied second for Words of Affirmation. It's Physical Touch."

"Mimi," I sheepishly grinned, "I think I'll just take the test myself if you don't mind."

She was miffed. The way that she wrinkled her nose when I disagreed, it was cute.

"Fine. You'll believe a test over me? Then test this, you illogical buffoon! I'll expect a full apology after you admit I'm right!"

My mouth fell agape. I was offended. "Illogical buffoon? How dare -"

Let me rephrase that. I was one hundred percent offended until Mimi Tachikawa stood to her feet, leaned in, cupped my cheeks, and planted a kiss on my forehead.

My body froze. Head over heels in love was an understatement.

"Stay just the way you are, Izzy Izumi. You're very handsome."

I had an instant nose bleed. Her test proved successful. I fully apologized.

We graduated high school and before we knew it we were twenty-one. In between those four years, we played a delicate dance of friend-zoned, and not friend-zoned.

What an enigma.

I watched how she spoke and flirted to other men within those four years, though hearing her confusion each time as to why I wanted to leave immediately after was internally insulting.

I had studied all her favorite romance movies on how the main characters fell in love. I read more advice online and asked friends on how to pursue her. As time passed, I grew more confident in being bolder with Mimi.

I would take her out to fancy dinners. Buy her expensive clothing. Helped her find a suitable place to live. Built her online store and gave sound advice regarding any business concerns. Anything she needed I would jump at the chance to show her how much I cared for her. That was my love language. She knew that.

Each time Mimi was sincerely grateful. I'd like to be clear that in no way did she take my actions for granted. However, the delicate dance we were in after each action either ended each time with Mimi giving a tight hug and a swift kiss on the cheek, or, and this is what left me confused each time, after her tight hug, as she would lean in for that kiss, she would pause.

That pause was crucial. Each time I would think 'This is it! I finally reached her!'

I didn't reach her. She would eventually tilt her head and kiss my cheek as usual.

I was friend-zoned again.

Did you know there are about three friend-zones? Granted, this friend-zone topic appears to be opinionated, so I will speak of the ones that I have found to be true to my research.

The first type of friend-zone is what we will call Conventional Friend-zone. There is an instant connection with their pheromones. However, the woman finds something that does not fit with her views. Perhaps something minor, such as the man falling on hard times and temporarily having to live with his parents. The woman tells him the excuse that she likes him, but she's not ready for anything serious, then wonders why the man eventually slips away from their so-called friendship.

This was not the case for us, thankfully.

The second kind of friend-zone is what I call the Soap Opera Friend-zone. In movies, the woman tells the interested man that she has many issues and she has too much respect to get him involved. What she doesn't explain is that she secretly wants him and is too scared to act on it in case he breaks her heart. Should this occur, it would add to the many issues she's currently dealing with. At first, it's admirable. However, it confuses me that if a man finds a woman worth her troubles, why not let him in? It's unnecessarily dramatic. The man leaves.

I'm very grateful to say this wasn't us at all.

The third type is what I call the Safety Zone/Best Friend Friend-zone. The woman and man are good friends. Maybe even best friends. She doesn't want to take a chance of pursuing something further because she wants to make sure that whatever happens in the future they stay good friends; it could ruin their friendship by trying to work out the chemistry that she's unsure the man may or may not reciprocate. Therefore, by staying in this zone the woman believes it is in their best interest that they're both sheltered from heartbreak or embarrassment.

This is the category I believed Mimi thought we fell into.

I had wondered this for some time but was unsure of how to clear the air after all my subtle hints. To make matters worse, Mimi's love languages were speech and touch. She would want a grand declaration. As much as I wanted to honor it, that was embarrassing to me. There had to be another way.

Thus, our delicate dance.

After Mimi turned twenty-two, I had grown tired of waiting. I needed to know how she felt. I wanted to be acknowledged or placed out of my misery.

There is this famous quote defining insanity as repeating the same action and expecting different results. There is much truth to this. My subtle hints weren't working. Mimi kept telling me to stay myself. That confused me at the time, that is until I decided to take a different course of action.

To this day, I am not one to make grand gestures. That is not who I am. When I took that chance and asked her out I did it on my terms instead of what I perceived Mimi may have wanted. This is why I thought she was insane when she said yes.

We had agreed to meet at her apartment for lunch on an early Saturday afternoon. I had made sure to cancel all business meetings so that there were no interruptions. Granted, I could have visited in more relaxing attire, but I was in love with Mimi Tachikawa and this was going to be my official mating dance: A freshly pressed, crisp black business suit with a white collared shirt, and a black and white checkered tie. Shined black shoes and a bouquet of red roses.

"Izzy, honestly, when was the last time I saw you in a cotton t-shirt and shorts?" Mimi laughed as she greeted me at her door.

"I wanted to look nice for our lunch date." I handed her the rose bouquet and entered. I felt my ears burning, but I couldn't focus on that or I'd lose my nerve.

She laughed again and sniffed her roses after closing the door. "Oh? Now it's a lunch date?"

"Yes," I smiled, took my shoes off, and stepped into her living room. "I called it a lunch date yesterday. Were you not paying attention?"

"Well, yeah, friends say that all the time, but I didn't think -"

"You look beautiful," I declared, looking her over and took a step forward making the gap between us smaller.

Her light brown hair was tied into a messy bun. Frizzy strands of hair stood from all angles. The sheer white top she wore over a white spaghetti shirt with rainbow glitter was disheveled on her left hip. The green slacks wrinkled with a sauce stain on her right thigh. It was the same outfit I gave her as a recent, random gift. It gave me the impression she was rushing to finish preparing our lunch. If I had known, I'd have had takeout sent.

In truth, other than our wedding, that day was the most beautiful my Mimi ever was.

I saw in her eyes she realized her appearance was off. Mimi tucked the bouquet of roses under an arm, then hands flew to her hair trying to soothe the strands down out of embarrassment.

"You're early! I was supposed to have fifteen more minutes. Oh no! My pants!" She whined while examining the stain.

"Leave it."

"What. Are you nuts?" She clicked her tongue. Mimi walked past me, laid the bouquet on the edge of her kitchen table, dressed in a pale pink linen tablecloth, and started to walk past me.

I knew she was going to change clothes and fix her hair. Normally, I wouldn't mind, but if I didn't say anything right then and there I knew I would miss my chance and chicken out.

I took her right arm and pulled her back to me. Holding her close, ignoring her surprised expression, I said the one thing I know would cause her to wrinkle her cute nose again with miff.

"You're wrong. My love language is not Words of Affirmation. It's only Acts of Service. I don't need to take a test online, or hear it from you to confirm this."

That nose wrinkled. It really was cute.

"Excuse me? This isn't the time for that." As much as Mimi wanted to fix her appearance, she couldn't let it go. I had her in the palm of my hand. Another tsk was thrown my way. "I've known you forever and I know that I'm right! You even said so that -"

"You're not always right, and it's okay to admit that you're wrong," I said in a soft, comforting tone.

She never did like to be challenged.

"This isn't a time for that conversation! I have to hurry up and change and put these pants to soak so it doesn't stain. So if you can just let go of my arm -"

"I thought you were right when we were seventeen. Any touch or kiss from you clouds my thoughts," I tried to soothe her pride. "I think I get what you were trying to say about me being myself."

A mischievous eyebrow from Mimi rose and she smirked. She wrapped her arms around my waist like she normally did in the past before she would hug me and kiss my cheek. This was what I was waiting for. This is what I was going to use to help her see we did not need to be in that SafetyZone/Best Friend Friend-zone.

Either that or she was truly a flirt by nature, which I refused to believe.

"It took you five years to figure that out? That's smart."

I knew she was teasing me, but she was walking on that fine line where teasing turns into irritation.

"Can we not do this dance? I'm trying to be serious here."

"Serious on our surprise lunch date? That's hot," she teased, sticking her tongue out at me while using her fingers to comb a strand of my red hair that fell loose back into its proper place.

"Mimi," I insisted as my frustration grew. "I asked you out last night. You're the one who mistook it as friends hanging out at lunch today."

Truth be told, I knew when I asked Mimi out the day before that she would misunderstand and think it was a normal hangout. I had hoped for the miscommunication so that her guard was not raised when I would confess.

Her eyes widened. I kept eye contact to show how I meant what I said, as her forehead wrinkled in what I interpreted in confusion, then softened. I could tell Mimi was analyzing her feelings and I could sense her come to a conclusion in her mind that I was about to be rejected.

I refused to be pigeonholed into this ridiculous friend-zone when my suspicion of her insecurity was overtaking the situation. Not claiming defeat was the best thing I ever did.

I spoke her love language.

I held her cheeks and gingerly laid a lingering kiss on her forehead. I didn't care that I felt awkward doing so, or that resting my hand on one of her cheeks, the other on the side of her neck, was out of my comfort zone. I was going to do whatever it took with my mating dance to win her affection.

"You were trying to tell me at that time to be myself. Well, being myself is doing things for others, like looking up information about a new Digimon when we're in battle so that we can figure out how to defeat them, or upgrading our digivices to fit on our phones so it's easier to carry around.

"It's buying you new things, like another pair of those pants for you because who cares about stains, or helping you with the down payment so that you can get this apartment. It's being your taste tester so that you can become a chef. It's being there for you while you had your online store and giving you some business advice.

"Now I'd like to do an experiment. I'm going to kiss you, and this time it's going to be on the lips. I need you to be completely honest with yourself. If you don't feel an ounce of anything for me, then you may slap me. However, something tells me that you won't slap me."

Mimi Tachikawa, the most beautiful woman in the world, rested her hands on top of mine. Her eyes smiled with joy as, true to her nature, questioned my analysis with a teasing remark.

"Just how sure are you of the probability that I won't?"

My hands moved on their own, one on her lower back, the other resting on the back of her neck. A smile tugged on my lips sure of my accuracy as I pressed her against me.

"About ninety-nine point nine percent - save a point percent for error - but mainly because you find my pheromones alluring as so do I for you."

"I figured you'd say that," Mimi blushed, lowering her eyes. "So scientific and analytical."

I detected a bit of sadness. I had a feeling she waited so many years for this moment and built up the perfect way for it to go. I had to push even further out of my comfort zone to help keep her in reality.

"Mimi, I'm not one of your romance movies. I'm not going to be able to say what you consider to be the right words at the right time and have all the answers figured out as you'd like me to in your world.

"I think what you were trying to tell me all this time was to be myself instead of trying so hard to win your attention. You do know me well, and something tells me you've always known that Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch were not my natural love language in the first place. I think, and this is where that point percentage comes in, that you said that lie so that if I ever did return your feelings it would guarantee that I would do it the way that you'd prefer. An oxymoron, but coming from you, it makes sense."

She lowered her eyes with a look of shame. I was right. However, it appeared she took what I relayed as a rebuke.

I gently tilted her head up with a finger under her chin and bent my knees enough to look into her eyes. My heart beat fast as I made my declaration.

"Make no mistake: I'm in love with you, Mimi Tachikawa, pheromones and all. Ever since you returned from The United States I have waited for this moment to share that with you.

"Now, I'd like to begin our experiment. It's one I'm confident that you'll respond positively to. After that, well," I started to fumble in my words, "I-I was hoping, that is, well, I'd like to ask, um, the status of our relationship to be raised to, uh -"

Mimi, whose very presence could brighten any room with the array of colors that resided in her, cupped my cheeks and chuckled as tears of joy streamed down her cheeks. "Just shut up and kiss me, my handsome buffoon."

Before I could protest at the unnecessary name-calling, she closed the gap.

I don't wish to share our, uh, activities after that, but, um, I can confirm my experiment was successful.

Pheromones? Love? At that point, they were all the same to me.

Imagine a scale, if you will. One that measured between the pigmentation of the blackest of black coloring to the purest of white. Before becoming Mimi's boyfriend everything I faced was measured to the extreme on the black side.

Afterward, with her views on the purest of white side, which I considered as a prism that once held in the sunlight in the right direction revealed a rainbow of colors, it helped give me a second view in life - somewhere in the middle. Marrying Mimi Izumi gave my life balance.

Hold on. Where's my handkerchief...Ah, here we go. Excuse me. I need to wipe my eyes.

This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. I'll speed this up because I don't think I can handle this much longer.

My wife gave me a son and daughter that I'm so proud of. As insane that she was to say yes to me on our lunch date, and again after I proposed, I'm convinced that despite being an illogical enigma, she understood things far better than I could ever comprehend when it came to the human heart.

The day before she passed away at home, I think she knew it was going to happen. Mimi insisted that I'd stay home and stay in bed with her. What only a select few of you knew was that my wife had emphysema. The worst part of it all was that she had never smoked in her life. Apparently, it isn't common, but it's still possible.

She decided to face life with a smile and claimed that now she could wear as many wigs as she wanted due to the chemotherapy. I knew she was trying to stay strong for me and our kids with their families, so I humored her. I gave her all the best quality wigs she desired.

I'll never forget our conversation as I laid next to her.

"Who told you to be eighty-eight years old and still have this peppy energy to run the company?" Mimi teased in a strained voice as she did her best to use all her strength to snuggle close to me in bed that morning.

I made haste to meet her the rest of the way. The less energy she used for anything, the better.

"It's what I love to do, Mimi. You know this company is not work for me. It's just another extension of my life."

A sad frown grew. "We need to have that talk."

"No, we don't," I stubbornly argued.

She hurried to cough into a wad of tissues. "Izzy, I flew around the world with you and sought out all different kinds of treatments. Now it's time for you to listen to me. This will be the only time I'll bring this up."

In the pit of my stomach, I knew what she was trying to say. I honored her wish and bit my tongue. Instead, I caressed her head waiting to hear her peace.

"Tomorrow, I'd like it for you to announce to the company that you're handing it over to our children. They're ready for it. They've been ready for it. It's time for you to go on a Mediterranean cruise. See the pyramids. Argue with a French waiter. Make fun of the guards that stand in front of the castle in England. Go on a tour bus in Hollywood and look for celebrity homes."

As serious as the matter was, I couldn't help but laugh. "We've already done all that, and you were the one that argued with that French waiter - which by the way was embarrassing. And I don't think the Foot Guards appreciated you making funny faces at them while they were on duty."

She weakly smiled. "I don't regret it one bit because I lived my life, but I can imagine that it'd be way funnier if you did something similar."

"There's no point without you," I cried into her hair.

I could feel her pat my back. "But there is. I'll still be alive in our kids and grandkids. We have pictures and videos of our past. The best way to remember me is by living your life to the fullest. Stop playing only with that chessboard, and start looking to the sky more often for rainbows."

I wiped my eyes with a chuckle. She never forgot it when I compared us to a chessboard and a rainbow in a random argument we had one day.

She cupped my cheeks and kissed my forehead as she had always done. Then, Mimi left a lingering kiss on my lips, one that I did not want to leave.

"You change my life for the better," Mimi insisted as a tear rolled down her right cheek. "I am so happy that you were the one to take the first step in telling me that you felt the same way. I am so happy that I walked down that aisle with you. I have never experienced so much joy than raising two beautiful children. And as many times as I wanted to slap you around when you didn't agree with me -"

"Hey!" I protested.

She laughed until a coughing fit occurred. Just like Mimi to tease me in the middle of a serious moment. After she calmed her breathing, my late wife finished her point.

"If I was given the choice to start this life over again, I would pick you in a heartbeat. If I'm able to reincarnate, I'll wait for you. The only thing that will make me sad is if you take whatever precious life you have left and waste it hiding away in our home.

"But I can't do this without you."

Mimi took a deep breath in until her strong facade broke. She cried into my chest. "I'm scared. I don't want to die. There are so many things I still want to do, but I decided to accept my death. The only thing that will make this hard for me is if I know that you're not willing to accept this. Tell me you're not going to do anything dumb. Tell me that you're going to enjoy the rest of your life playing with our grandchildren and seeing the world - retired and free of all responsibilities."

"Mimi, I can't -"

_"Tell me!"_

That sent her in another coughing fit. The guilt that rose for causing this temporary pain never felt so real.

"Okay!" I rushed to hug her close as her coughing calmed. "Okay! Okay, I'll do it. I swear I'll put in my resignation tomorrow and hand everything over to our kids. You're right. I rather spend the rest of our days of what's left together."

"And?" she desperately pleaded with those large, beautiful, exhausted, brown eyes.

I rested my forehead against hers and spoke the words with a heavy heart. "I won't spend what I have left withering away here. I'll learn to look up at the sky more often for rainbows and see the world."

"Thank you," she whispered and hugged me with what energy she had left.

At eighty-eight years old, Mimi Izumi passed peacefully in her sleep the following night.

After we lay her to rest today, I'm going to the airport. I'm going to honor her request and...You know what? I said I wouldn't look at her today because I wanted to remember her alive. Let me stand next to her. I need to tell her this.

I'm sorry, Mimi. I'm trying not to cry. I know you said you wanted a celebration of your life at your wake, but -

Oh, thank you, son. You don't have to stand next to me. Yes, I'll be fine. Go sit down. You and your sister can take over the wake in a minute.

Mimi? I'm doing it. I bought a plane ticket to France because you always found it romantic. Then I'm flying to Egypt to see the pyramids. From there, I'm getting on a cruise ship that will explore the rest of the countries that line the Mediterranean Sea. I'll fly to England then to several states in The United States. I'm going to celebrate your life instead of mourn like you wanted me to.

I'll be gone for two months, and when I come back I'm going to make sure that the world doesn't forget about you. I'll set up culinary scholarships in your name. I'll do everything in my power to have your recipe book placed back in circulation. I'll spoil our grandkids.

And if I'm ever able to reincarnate…

Where's that handkerchief again? Ah, here it is.

Mimi, If I'm ever able to reincarnate I'll wait for you too because you're the only one that's able to insult me, confuse me, and make my heart flutter all at the same time. I can't wait until I'm able to have one breath of your hair, one kiss from your lips, one touch of your hand again, and until I see you again it'll feel like an eternity without you.

So, I love you, my bright enigma rainbow. I hope to see you again soon, but not too soon. Just like I promised.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this oneshot, please leave a kudos or a simple review of what you enjoyed :) Writing is a fun hobby for me and to hear what you enjoyed would make my day. Next oneshot will be out in a few weeks.


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